Training on mindfulness requires effort. It is not passively watching the world go by. We remind ourselves to recognise what is truly happening, including during difficult times. From that informed position, we continually make choices for our well-being and that of others.
Paying attention is boring
I feel the sense of disengagement comes during the training itself. Continuously paying attention inwardly or outwardly can be boring, very much like lifting weights repetitively at the gym. The effort of watching the world go by and not reacting to or doing anything about it can feel detached.
Mindfulness invites us to pay attention to the present moment on purpose without judgment. The non-judgment bit usually confuses many people. Does it mean my relationship with the world is without emotions? It can also be difficult to practice, since we are aware that we are constantly judging based on our own prejudices, bias and stereotypes.
During mental training, we simply notice something and accept it. We do nothing more. However, realise this: the techniques are active. During training, most of my students experience constant distraction. The sweet spot of mindfulness manifests when we are aware that we are distracted right now. We then make a deliberate choice to shift our mind’s focus back to the present.
Like driving a car
We can be scanning internally (how we feel physically and emotionally) and our surroundings. That check allows us to attend to matters requiring intervention. Let me use the experience of driving a car as a metaphor. We are essentially glancing at the dashboard (internal) and looking out of the windows (external). If the fuel indicator shows low, we can plan to detour to a petrol kiosk. Or delay that visit for another 24 hours. Applied to myself, I’m feeling hungry now writing this article. Do I stop for a bite or complete my train of thought and eat an hour later?
Very much like micro-tears in our muscle fibres when lifting heavy weights, paying attention on purpose activates and strengthens our pre-frontal cortex (the “CEO” of the brain) and the reticular activation system (the signals gatekeeper). Done again and again, the brain remembers the experience and starts to rewire. This phenomena is called neuroplasticity.
However, emotional storms brew sometimes. Like being stuck in a traffic jam on the only road to your destination, we get frustrated, angry or sad. This type of weather will be difficult just sit and notice. Through regular practice, can we lean into the discomfort, and hold the difficult thought in heightened awareness? Instead of stoically restraining ourselves, can we observe how anger or disappointment is coursing through our body? Can we learn more about ourselves, our expectations and assumptions? Can we discover a deeper stillness within ourselves, within the storm?
Next steps: Attend a public class, arrange for a private session, or plan for a corporate workshop.
